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In New York City, detective Luigi Mackeroni investigates a string of mysterious penile mutilations at the Hotel Quickie. After Mackeroni attempts to have a tryst with a gigolo he meets in the lobby, a carniverous condom bites off his right testicle and flees, which sets the detective off on a quest to stop the predatory prophylactic once and for all.
Frank, a perpetual loser from the "milieu", runs over a pedestrian during an argument with his lover Sabine and commits a hit-and-run. A petty criminal and friend of the dead man, to whom he has confessed his crime, hires him as a "bill collector" and charges him with a murder he committed himself.
